mornings

for months i've been getting out of bed between 6am and 7am... i try to aim for 6am, but sometimes it's a little more difficult. however.. my body and mind know that sleeping past 7am only brings difficulty, not extra rest.

as soon as i sleep in i wake up feeling not only more exhausted, but also behind. the day has already started without me and i'm just catching up. now, it would be great if there would be no need to catch up and i can just let it all go... but most days i just can't conjure up that feeling.

so i wake up early. and see the light go from dark to light slowly. it's calm. it's allowing my myself a bit of peace before the violence of the daytime starts: rougher lights, harsher sounds.

i just don't know yet how to make my evenings feel as nice. i'm sure it involves shrugging of some of the armour we have to wear during the day.. but i'm still figuring it out. for now the mornings are good and vibey.